Ecstatic over the recent U.S. Cellular win, a Hal Riney executive claims client has a soul.

I know we treat corporations like humans. In fact, corporations have more inalienable human rights, in the legal sense, than do humans; but if the time has arrived to start treating corporations like spiritual beings, well, fuck ‘em.

Advertising people say the stupidest things. Particularly whenever the press/media come a knockin’. Whatever happened to dignified restraint?

Hint to Riney Agency: The reason your new client, U.S. Cellular, is the number-one ranked wireless company for customer service is because nobody’s heard of them and they haven’t many customers. But now that you’ve gone on the record saying, “… at this point they (U.S. Cellular) haven’t leveraged that (number one ranking for customer service),” well it’s just a matter of time, and advertising budget, until you screw up that ranking. The more they advertise, the more customers they will get, which means they will be inundated with customer requests/problems/service issue, which means the much ballyhooed number one ranking is about to crash.

By the way, I’ve never given much thought to the Cellular category and I don’t plan to but if I did, I’d add ad agencies to the cellar dwellers in terms of consumer satisfaction. Click to Open Web Page